The sounds of the old gospel tune were whirling about my head. Inside, down in my heart was a burning. I was being drawn to the feet of Jesus.

The preacher had extended the invitation: "Don't hold back. Jesus is calling you today. Just get out of your seat and come up here and receive Him. Jesus is calling. Won't you come?"

The presence of the Lord was just strong on me. I knew, in reality, Jesus was calling. It wasn't just the preacher or the music, it was Jesus Christ Himself calling me to come and to give my life to Him.

I was 9 years old that day when I gave my heart to Jesus in the Southern Baptist Church in Illinois and from that day until now, God's hand was upon my life.

Unfortunately, I was not so faithful. I suppose one could blame it on lack of teaching in the Word of God, or a lack of the dynamic power of the Holy Spirit enabler, but for whatever reason, soon after my initial experience I began to slip back into the life of sin that is so prevalent in the world today.

Following the Crowd
Like so many young people, I was a crowd follower. When the neighborhood kids started smoking cigarettes, I was right there with them. When I was 15, we began getting hold of six packs of beer and drinking.

By the time I was 17, I had developed a dependence on alcohol and was drinking virtually every night. By this time I was so rebellious that my parents had just about given up trying to control me. It didn't matter what they said, I just did whatever I wanted.

In my junior year of high school I missed 35 days of school. Often I'd just go party with my friends or drive around instead of going to school. My grades weren't much, but I managed to get by...

When I remember those days, I often think about how much God-given potential was wasted, and is wasted by millions of kids like me, who destroy their minds from alcohol and drug use. It's like taking a brand new car and taking it to a demolition derby. It just doesn't make sense. God has given us bright, shiny new minds, but we have taken them to Satan's demolition derby where they are destroyed.

It's so sad to see young people wasting their lives in various ways. Often times, they are just too naive to see the reality of what they are doing to themselves until it's too late. I often think how good it would have been if I had continued to walk with God from that time I went forward in that Baptist church. How much pain and misery could have been avoided...How much more my life could have meant...

But thank God, the Lord is merciful and willing to receive us back and teach us the ways of life. Like the prodigal son, who found himself far away from his father, feeding swine and in misery, we too can return unto our Heavenly Father and again receive His love and blessing.

Well, finally in 1968, I managed to graduate from high school, to the great relief of my parents. My folks always put a great deal of emphasis on education. They were willing to do nearly anything to see me go to college, so they virtually supported me through my first two years of college.

But to little avail. . .

Most of those two years were spent in the bars, chasing women or otherwise avoiding the classroom. After two years of attending college, I managed to accumulate about one year's worth of college credits.

After my second year of college however, Susan and I were married and for a while it seemed like I was going to straighten out, at least as far as my education was concerned.

I began attending classes, studying and applying myself to school. I became interested in journalism and began feverously taking classes in that field. Rather than the old flunky of the past, I found myself on the dean's list, excelling in most of my classes.

Enter Marijuana
It was about that time I began to come under another influence -- marijuana. Although I had by no means given up drinking at this point in my life, my alcohol use was under control somewhat. . . at least to the point where I could function effectively.

But one thing I've found out about the devil: if he can't get you one way, he'll get you another. So, I began to come under the influence of marijuana. Although the actual physical effects of marijuana use are less than alcohol use, it is a very subtle seductive drug. . . one which will lure you into hell, and at the same time make you think you want to go there.

By the time I had finished my fourth year of school (with three years' of credits), I decided I had had enough. I took a job on a small town weekly newspaper. During that time, my wife and I bought a secluded farm near the town where I worked.

It seemed the more the marijuana was allowed to influence me, the more I tended to withdraw from society. It is a mood altering drug, influencing a person's innermost thought patterns. I began to dwell on the evils of society, and began to think that the only way a person could find true happiness was by escaping society and living way off in the wilderness somewhere, far away from the world's troubles...

It wasn't long and my rebellious attitude and desire for seclusion and isolation caused me to resign my reporter's job. More and more I was turning inward, spending hours smoking pot and meditating in the woods on our farm. I thought I was achieving some type of God-consciousness and inner peace from the exercise, but in reality I was still missing what I needed the most. . . the peace that comes from walking in the presence of the Lord.

To the Wilderness
Without any income, we couldn't keep the farm. Besides, by this time, we decided we were going off to live in the wilderness, where we could truly escape the evils of society, and lead peaceful and happy lives.

As I look back on my life now, I can see that all the activities I was involved in were attempts to find satisfaction and happiness. When I discovered marijuana, I thought I had found the answer. It was, I thought, something that could give me the peace and joy which I was longing for so desperately.

In a way, I suppose, I was on the right track. The only problem was I was always looking for happiness in the wrong place. Man has all sorts of substitute happiness packages; some come in bottle or a pill or a joint, some come in bank accounts or material goods. . . but the truth is: only God satisfies, only He can fill the void with His love through Jesus Christ.

Marijuana took me out of my problems. It made me feel heavenly. It is the devil's substitute-heaven in a smoke. The only problem is...it didn't last. The more a person smoked, the less the effect would be, until finally, I came to the point where I needed to smoke almost constantly just to feel halfway decent. Of course, this constant stoning made me withdraw more and more, just wanting to be alone with my pipe, getting high.

After a little over a year, we sold the farm, deciding to travel around for a while and see the country. My wife and I moved to West Virginia to live near some of our long-haired, dope-smoking friends. From there we took a long hitchhiking trip out West, much to the dismay of our parents.

Plans to Move West
We returned with a desire to move out west, with an ultimate goal of moving into the wilderness of British Columbia. We built a makeshift camper on our pickup and headed out for parts unknown. By this time Susan was pregnant with our first child.

Looking back at this period in our life, I recognize that God was with us, in spite of the error of our way. Many times our lives were miraculously preserved. Jesus said He would never leave us nor forsake us and He never did.

Even though I was, in my outward life, living for the devil, God's hand was on me, drawing me gently to Himself. I remember my wife as a person of faith in those days. . . fervent in prayer. . . especially in times of desperate need. . . crying out to Jesus to help us.

We would read our Bibles, especially in those desperate times, but we had little conception of the type of life which the Lord was calling us to, or the power which was available to those who would consecrate themselves in His service.

I remember once we were picking apples in Illinois during that period of our lives and we met a fellow named Marvin. Marvin was the best apple knocker I've ever seen. We used to call him "Angel". Every time I'd see him, he'd say, "Hello Brother Tom..."and then share a verse of scripture or some godly wisdom with me along with the love of God. We didn't know it, but he was sowing the seeds of righteousness that would later grow and bring forth fruit. "Angel" called himself a Pentecostal-Lutheran.

We traveled all over, picking fruit, getting by any way we could, even going on welfare for a time. We lived in California, Oregon and finally Idaho.

While living in the mountains of Oregon, our first child, Heidi, was born. We didn't know it, but her birth was the beginning of the end of our wild, foot-loose-and-fancy-free lifestyle. Before her birth we could live almost anywhere, under any circumstances, but the responsibilities of parenthood began to weigh on us after her birth.

We had given up our dream of British Columbia after discovering the nature of the coastal climate of Oregon which was very similar to that of Canada's west coast. One wet clammy winter in Oregon convinced us that British Columbia was not the place for us.

Heart of Gold Mining Claim
Some friends of ours were living in Idaho, so we decided to pull up stakes and head out there. Perhaps there we would find our dream. . . a place to settle down. We didn't have any money. so we decided to file a mining claim on government land in Idaho and live there.

We filed the "Heart of Gold" miming claim in 1974. We never did much mining, aside from a few feeble attempts at panning gold, but we were really in a silver area and the mining was the type done with a pick and shovel.

The claim was located in a high mountain valley in southern Idaho. It was a beautiful grassy valley, with steep mountains ascending on either side. We thought we would build a makeshift shelter and spend the winter up there, until an old timer told us: "You'll never come out alive. . . " He said the valley was very prone to avalanches, which would bury us and our newborn little baby with tons of snow.

At this time we were very nearly starving. We had a few dry goods and we'd forage for whatever else we could find. One of our common meals was "Nettles and Noodles." Stinging nettle steamed is really not too bad. . . until you've had it for three or four weeks straight.

Land. . . Our New Goal
We were beginning to recognize the need for a change. Finally, we decided to travel back to my parents' home in Collinsville, Illinois, get a job and save money to buy some land.

"Land". . . that was my meditation for the next two years. All I could think about, all I was working for. . . was to get some land where we could settle down. I spent a year-and-a-half working for a chain of weekly newspapers. I didn't make much, but Susan worked too, and we managed to save all my checks towards our beloved goal-land.

It seemed at that time it was all that mattered. If we just had some land, everything would be all right. Little did we know it was just another empty shell placebo attempting to fulfill the real need in our lives-a relationship with the Lord Jesus.

And there were those who encouraged us along our empty shell path which we walked upon with rose-colored glasses. I remember one supposed Bible teacher and spiritual leader, who sat with us, drinking whiskey, telling us how we were really on the right track trying to get away from it all where we could truly find peace with God.

But now I realize that peace with God is not something you find in a certain place, or lifestyle or drug, or anything else, except through the Lord Jesus Christ.

Those two years of striving for our goal were some of the hardest of my life. I hated my job and everything it represented. The rebellion would rise up within me. Coming under the authority of my boss. . . cutting my hair. . .dressing according to specifications, all warred at me constantly. But I was willing to suffer it all for my beloved goal.

"Land. . .land. . .land. . ." I would think and somehow I made it through.

A Minnesota Winter
Susan and I and little Heidi moved to Southern Minnesota in October of 1976. We had enough for a down payment of a small parcel of land, and I had decided I couldn't stand another winter in the city. After making the down payment we had about $500 to build our home.

Purchasing rough sawn and used lumber, we managed to get a structure up by the middle of November. It was built on poles in the ground, with no insulation or inner walls. The green lumber which we used to sheet the structure shrunk, leaving large gaps, so that a thin layer of plastic was all that separated us from the -30 degree temperatures outside.

The people in the area said we'd never make it through the winter, and we almost didn't. But fortunately, as soon as the house was framed in and roofed, I got a job at a local saw mill. It didn't pay much, but one of the benefits was free access to a huge pile of tie ends which made excellent fuel for the wood stove.

The little tin stove in our house was kept firing to the "max" all winter long in an attempt to warm the cold winds seeping in the house from every direction. Most of our evenings were spent huddled next to the stove, bundled up with many layers of clothes.

That winter was the greatest physical struggle and the most frustrating time of my life. I felt as though I was enduring the chastening hand of the Lord. About midway through the winter, my pickup broke down and I had to walk to catch a ride to the sawmill in the mornings. It was one of the most depressing times of our lives. Such was the fulfillment of our dream.

Finding Jesus
But joy comes in the morning, and it was the following summer that we began to experience the reality of Jesus Christ, a reality which filled that emptiness and void which we tried to fill in so many other ways.

Chuck, a fellow I worked with at the sawmill started telling me about a group of "Spirit-filled" Christians meeting in the area. "How do you know they're Spirit-filled?" I asked him somewhat cynically. I didn't really understand what he was talking about, but he had stirred my curiosity at least.
On July 4th, 1977, this man and his wife had asked us to attend a meeting of these "Spirit-filled" Christians. An evangelist from Michigan was going to preach. The couple were quite enthusiastic about this preacher from Michigan and strongly encouraged us to attend.

For some reason we did.

That meeting must have been the strangest thing I had ever experienced. I guess that ever since my days back in the Baptist church in Illinois I had always seen church people as sort of hypocritical and phony. There didn't seem to be a reality to their existence. There seemed to me to be little correlation between what was said in church and what was done in their lives.

In my hippy days it was similar. All the ideas which we pretended to stand for were just a shallow reality. And it always seemed so difficult to find a sincere or truthful person.

But right away, I sensed a sincerity among these people. They loved the Lord and were willing to express that love outwardly. I didn't know if I could express that same kind of love, but I recognized in them a reality in their relationship with Christ. In my heart, something seemed to say: "This is what you've been looking for."

And as I got to know the people, I began to sense a real sincere love towards me. They cared about me. I didn't know it at the time, but that was the love of Jesus shining through them.

As the meeting went on, I was in awe with the teaching of the evangelist from Michigan. I remember he taught on the two olive trees of Zechariah 4. I don't think I understood much of what I heard.
After the preaching, people began coming up for prayer, Chuck, my friend from the sawmill, went up front. Suddenly he started shouting at the top of his voice: "Hallelujah!" Chuck is normally sort of a quiet fellow, but his voice that night showed no trace of inhibition.

Afterwards, he testified that God had healed his heart. He had been suffering with a heart problem, caused by a childhood disease. Because one of the valves in his heart remained open, his blood pressure could not be properly maintained. It was a serious problem, and the doctors were recommending open heart surgery.

The next day, I saw Chuck right after he had left the doctor's office. They had checked his blood pressure, and it had been returned to normal. I was awe struck. Once again, something within me seemed to say: "This is what you've been looking for!"

As I began to recognize the power of God, I began to go after it. I wanted all that God had. I wanted to be filled with the Holy Ghost power like Jesus talked about in Acts 1:8: "And ye shall receive power after the Holy Ghost is come upon you..."

I began to recognize that the drugs and alcohol I was using were a hindrance to me in my relationship with God. I attended every meeting, read my Bible constantly, began to pray and seek God.
But I was still struggling with the old habits. While I was finding more peace than I had had for as long as I could remember, from time to time it seemed, I'd be attacked by anxiety and have to get some beer or smoke some marijuana. I wasn't really set free.

I remember late in August, I began to sense that God wanted me to be water baptized. I don't know how to explain it. It wasn't that He spoke to me directly, the way He later did, it was just as if I knew in my heart that the Lord wanted me to.

My wife had been baptized a few weeks before, after a miraculous conversion experience, but I hadn't been ready at the time. I battled within myself for several weeks over this leading to be water baptized.

A Day of Destiny
One day, when I had had an exceptionally frustrating day at work, I headed home, planning to stop at the store for some beer. But something within me seemed to restrain me, and somehow, I made it home sober, but very frustrated.

After arguing and bickering with my wife for a while, we decided to take a ride and cool off a bit. It was a hot September day. In the back of my mind I was thinking about getting some beer and trying to relax a bit. That was always the way I'd relax when I got uptight...peace in a bottle. Jesus said; "My peace I give unto you, not as the world giveth." The world has its peace... but it's not the real thing.
But when I drove past the store where I had thought to buy the beer, something inside me seemed to restrain me.

We decided to go see one of the ministers in the area, Danny Bohan. Brother Danny had been an encouragement to us and it was from him we first heard the teaching on the baptism of the Holy Ghost and the foundation that God wants to lay in every believer's life. He had done a lot to encourage me in my quest for the things of the Spirit.

As I talked with Danny, I started sharing how I was finding more peace in my life since I had begun coming to the meetings, reading my Bible and seeking God, but that there were times that tremendous frustration would come upon me.

Danny listened patiently and counseled with me. Then he prayed that the peace of God would come upon me. As he prayed and laid hands on me, I sensed the power of God come through his hands and a supernatural peace just came upon me.

Danny and I talked a while longer and then he turned to me and said: "You know, brother, you need to be baptized."

I just bowed my head there and thought about it for a few minutes. Finally I looked up at him and said: "Okay, let's go." So Susan, Danny and I went down to the creek and I was baptized.

Water baptism is an important step for every believer. God ordained water baptism for a reason. He knew what he was doing. Jesus commanded it. The apostles commanded it. And the believers in the early days of the church all responded to His command. Water baptism brings a consciousness in the believer of his separation from the world. In it he identifies with the death, burial and resurrection of Christ, thus considering himself dead unto sin and alive unto God. (Rom. 6)

At the time of my baptism, I was standing upon the promise in Acts 2:38, where Peter had said: "Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost." I was seeking the gift of the Holy Ghost and I knew it was God's Word that He would give to me as I obeyed Him in water baptism.

So after the baptism, Susan and I drove home in the pickup. Arriving home, I just sat in the truck, with Susan beside me, seeking the filling of God's Spirit. As I was praying and seeking God, I began to think about my old habits, wondering what life would be like without those things.
Just then, it was as if someone turned on a radio inside of me, and the Lord spoke to me saying: "Turn from the things of the world."

Awe struck and steeped in gratitude over this heavenly communication, immediately, I said, "Yes Lord, I will." At that instant I was filled from the top of my head to the tip of my toes with the power of God.

Some have described their experience in this manner as like "liquid love". It was like that, but I remember at the time thinking it was like a high power charge of electric energy. It was indescribably beautiful. And it was real.

I had asked God, that when He filled me with His Spirit that it would be so powerful, that it would leave no doubt in my mind as to its authenticity. He answered that prayer . . . and then some.
After the initial waves of the Spirit passed through my body, I was given some supernatural utterance in an unknown tongue. I remember speaking these few syllables out and rejoicing over what God had given me.

Then I again began to hear from that radio inside. God began to speak things to me and impressing on me to speak them forth. "Precious is the blood of the Lamb," He said, "which was shed for you."
"I give you a new life, free from the bonds of iniquity," I heard and then spoke. The Lord then began to minister to me concerning holiness and the need to follow Him and not to go back into the old way of life. Then I heard Him say a curious thing, "Israel is here". At the time I didn't understand this, but a few weeks later I heard someone sharing about how we, as Christians, are Israel (God's chosen people) and that we've been grafted in and made part of the commonwealth of Israel supernaturally. (Eph. 2:12)

As it says in Romans 2:29: "He is a Jew, which is one inwardly . . ."

God ministered a number of things to me supernaturally that night which He later confirmed to me by His Word. They were things that I had not yet seen in the scripture, but by His Spirit He showed them to me, thus confirming the move of the Spirit in my life and also confirming to me personally the authenticity and integrity of His Word.

I'm just thankful for what the Lord has done for me and my family and so many others. It's such a tremendous blessing to experience His boundless love.

Since that night, I never again had a problem with the old habits that had bound me for so long. I had truly been given a "new life, free from the bonds of iniquity". And the life which he's given me by His Spirit and through His Word is without comparison to anything else in the world.

In 1983, the Lord called me into full-time ministry. Since that time I have been sharing the news of God's great love and power through Jesus Christ. As a result, we have seen God's mighty power in action. Jesus Christ continues to do what He does best, miracles and changed lives.

I waited patiently for the Lord: and he inclined unto me, and heard my cry. He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the mirey clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings. And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the LORD.(Psalm 40:1-3)

Tom Shanklin travels nationally an internationally preaching the Gospel of Jesus Christ. For additional material, scheduling information or to receive our monthly newsletter, please write: Tom Shanklin Ministries, PO Box 4144, Mankato, MN 56002.