"I John take thee Mary to be my wedded wife, to have and
to hold, from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer
for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love cherish and to
cherish, till death us do part. . ."
These words or similar ones, commonly spoken in marriage ceremonies,
reflect the will of God concerning the the holiness and sanctity
of the commitment that is made between a man and a woman at the
time of their marriage. It almost seems, however, that many people
had their fingers crossed when making this sacred vow.
More than 50 percent of all marriages covenants made since
1970 will end in divorce, according to statistics from the U.S.
Department of Labor. The fallout from the United States Atomic
Divorce Bomb is tremendous. Children are the innocent victims.
Many suffer from physical, sexual and psychological abuse as a
result of this breakdown of the family.
Studies indicate, for example, that children living with non-biological
step-parents are as much as 100 times more likely to be the victims
of fatal abuse as those living with both biological parents. Biological
parents, apparently, tend to care more than non-biological parents.
But that's just the tip of the iceberg created by society's penchant
for changing marital partners. The psychological effects on both
children and abandoned spouses, the increase in crime as a result
of lack of parental supervision, the breakdown of authority structures
and many other things are the by-products of this phenomena, which
also have devastating effects on the society in which we live.
Has anybody thought that maybe, just maybe, God had the right
idea about marriage? He said that a man should leave his mother
and father and cleave (remain attached to) his wife. Jesus specifically
forbade divorce, except in the case of fornication. God specifically
says that he hates divorce.
". . .the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife
of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet
is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant. And did not
he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore
one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your
spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his
youth. For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting
away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD
of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not
treacherously." (Malachi 2:14-16, KJV).
God calls dumping your wife "treachery." Treachery is
like treason or breaking a sacred covenant. The dictionary says
that it's a willful betrayal of fidelity, confidence, or trust.
When you are joined to your wife or husband in Holy Matrimony,
God is the witness of that covenant, and He makes that which was
two to become one. You are now one, so keep it that
way.
And why does he require this fidelity? "That he might
seek godly seed." In other words, that your children might
be raised in a godly atmosphere become godly moms and dads themselves
in the next generation.
As you can see, the bad news is: there's too much divorce.
But the good news is: it doesn't have to be that way.
Let me give you four keys for keeping your marriage intact:
1. Keep Christ in your marriage. Church attendance, Bible reading
and prayer are essential to a successful marriage. God is the
third partner to your marriage covenant and in Him you can find
the help to succeed in your marriage and every area of life.
2. Keep the romance in your marriage. Keep up the same things
that brought you together in the first place. Go out on dates
(without the children) and learn to have fun together. A stale
relationship opens the door to temptation. Work on it!
3. Don't buy into the philosophy and ideology that is promoted
through the secular media today. Popular sitcoms, talk shows,
news and even educational programs often promote an ideology which
promotes promiscuity, unfaithfulness and an uncommitted way of
life.
4. Decide to stay together. Love is more than an emotional feeling.
It is a decision. It is a commitment. You must make a choice of
your will to love and cherish, "till death do you part."
There may be some rough waters, but stick with it. It really is
the best way